Why do I want a relationship so bad: It is completely normal to want a relationship with someone special you love and who loves you back. But sometimes the urge to find a partner can go too far. When you want a relationship so badly, you could want it for all the reasons, and this can make your single life feel sad and painful.
Here are some possible explanations of why you want to be in relation and advice on how to handle being single when you want a relationship.
Why do I want a relationship so bad:
You feel lonely
Being single can make you feel lonely. Sure, you might act normal during the day, but at night, you imagine having someone to cuddle with. This is a basic human necessity. However, make sure that “someone” is not just anyone. If you start feeling lonely, you may settle for someone just for the sake of being in a relationship. This is not the right reason to start a relationship, even if it is completely understandable.
Everyone else around you is in a relationship
What if everyone you know and hang out with is in a relationship? It may feel horrible to always be the third wheel if all your friends are already in a relationship. However, this problem is easy to solve. Try to get more single people like you, but avoid ditching your coupled-up friends. You can always grow your social circle, and your friends are going to be in and out of relationships just like you. It may feel like you are the only single person in the world because you keep on focusing so much on your relationship status.
You feel pressurized by society, family, or friends
Family and society can be terrible at putting pressure on you when you are single. There is a higher chance that you may feel societal pressure to commit to someone as soon as possible. You may feel like you do not belong to them just because you are single, and even your friends may be pressuring you to stay in a relationship. Do not let them get to you. Peer pressure may feel strong, but it is not a valid reason to settle.
You want to start a family
There are a lot of single people who want children, and they are eager to find someone who can become a good father/mother. We do not have to tell you that having children is a big deal everybody out there already knows. But, Normally, you want to start a family one day but do not let it be your only motive for starting a relationship.
You require emotional support
Things could have been easier for you if you had a partner you could depend on for your emotional necessities and help. However, by finding the motivation internally, rather than externally, you will become more independent. It is nice to have someone to support you during hard days or while you are pursuing your dreams, yet it is not a good enough reason to get into a relationship.
you want a rebound relationship
There are higher chances that you are finding it hard to move on from your ex. You may have had a bad breakup and you believe that a rebound relationship will help you heal. You may be torturing yourself with thoughts like this after a breakup, and you think that having someone around all the time to support will make the heartache less painful. But, it is a much better option to let time do its thing. Slowly move on from your ex on your own so that you can form healthy relationships once you are healed.
You want your ex back
Maybe your ex cheated you or broke your heart in any way, and you broke up with them because you wanted to punish them. But now all of your anger is gone and you want your ex back at any cost.
You feel bored in life
Not having a partner can be boring for some people and you may be one of those. You can have family and friends, but at the same time, you also have a lot of free time in your schedule that could otherwise be set aside for dating someone. Instead of looking for a relationship, use this time to work on self-improvement and get involved in self-care. Do not think much about your relationship status.
You have financial reasons
Being in a relationship can pay off. Maybe your love language is getting a lot of gifts, and you love being taken to a fancy restaurant and obtaining expensive jewelry as a gift. Or maybe you would simply like someone to divide your rent with because the bills are too high. However, one should refrain himself/herself from getting into a relationship for financial reasons. It may or may not be morally right for you, but we are not going to talk about that, I just want to say that it is not a healthy foundation for a serious relationship.
Also Read: How to become financially independent?
There are certain circles, where relationships can enhance your social status. Maybe you want a relationship so badly because you want to be more popular. Possibly you believe that you will be more respected in certain circles if you are in a relationship. But understand that you are not going to be single forever. So, why not let your social status wait?
Afraid of staying single
You may feel that you are hard to love and believe that you will never find love. You feel that maybe love is not meant for you and you will end up staying single forever. But know that you are going to get into a relationship eventually and it does not have to happen right now. You should not force a relationship out of fear of staying single. It is never too late to find love, and you should avoid settling for anyone purely out of fear of being alone.
You want someone else to complete you
Many people want a relationship because they hate living without a romantic partner. However, your life can be fulfilling when you are single, it is just a matter of thinking. At the same time, it is unhealthy to expect another person to complete you. While this idea may seem romantic in a fictional world, in reality, being overly dependent on another person is not a good thing. You can not depend on anyone else for your happiness, and you have to give your life meaning, irrespective of your relationship status.
You need someone to take care of you
Whether it is emotionally, or financially, we all feel the need to have someone take care of us. It is completely normal. However, you should still focus on being more independent and making yourself happy. Desiring too much from a person you have not even met yet is not a good idea to live with. What if they fail to take care of all of your needs even if you are a good match for them? Know how to take care of yourself instead of depending on a partner who may or may not meet all your needs.
You want safety and security
There are a lot of people who want a relationship because it brings them a sense of safety, peace, and security. However, a relationship is not a guarantee of getting a happy life. Relationships are not always sound and peaceful. Issues happen, people break up, get back together, get married, or get divorced, depending on the situation of the person. Hence, there is no doubt in saying that relationships are complicated. You can not expect them to be smooth all the time.
How to stop wanting a relationship:
Enjoy your own company
You can spend quality alone time with yourself instead of feeling alone. Make yourself feel good by doing things that make you satisfied. Treat yourself the way you would like your partner to treat you.
Focus on other aspects of your life
Your love life may not be perfect but understand that your whole life is not limited to your love life, and there are sother different aspect in your life too on which you can focus. So, stop looking for a relationship and put all of your efforts into improving yourself and your career. You can also focus on making new friends.
Practice self-care
Buy yourself a box of chocolates or something healthy, take a warm bath after a massage with light-scented candles, and enjoy a glass of wine. Do anything that makes you happy, practice self-care, and pamper yourself until you feel spoiled by yourself.
Experience new things in life
Start a hobby, draw something that you wanted to draw for a long time, or learn anything new. Fix your schedule with fun things to do that make you feel fulfilled.
Set goals
It is easy to do different things in your free time when you are working on self-improvement and setting plans to reach your goals.
Do not force anything
There are higher chances that after a certain time, you may start suffering from dating burnout if you force yourself to date just because you want a relationship so badly. So, avoid forcing anything and let it go with the flow.
Take a break from different dating apps
To stop dating burnout, it is a wonderful idea to take a break from dating. Yes, you desire to find love, but love usually finds you when you are not looking for it. For this, you should consider taking a break from dating apps.
Spend more time with friends and family
Use this extra free time to spend with family and parties with friends. Reconnect with old friends and become friends with new people. Your social life might need modification, and it could even guide you to the relationship that you are looking forward to.
Enjoy the benefits of being single
Being single can be great because you are free to do whatever you want. Enjoy all the benefits of being single.
Talk to a therapist
In the end, if it seems too difficult to stay single, and you desperately want to get into a relationship as soon as possible, you can take the help of someone who can help you deal with this. A therapist can assist you in overcoming your fears of being single, so you can become more independent.
FAQ
Craving a relationship is a common experience that many single people face. The reasons behind this strong desire may differ from person to person. Some may desire a relationship due to a deep longing for emotional connection and closeness. The desire for love, affection, and companionship can be a strong reason why you crave a relationship so badly.
The desire to be in a relationship can be caused by various factors. We as a human are inherently social creatures and crave meaningful connections. A relationship allows companionship, emotional support, and shared experiences. Being in a relationship can give a sense of belonging, and acceptance. It satisfies the natural need for love, affection, and closeness.
If you want to stop looking for a relationship so badly, here are a few suggestions:
Know yourself better
Take the time to understand your motivations for wanting a relationship. Find out if there are any underlying insecurities (fear of being left alone) behind wanting a relationship. Understanding yourself better can help you deal with these emotions.
Focus on personal growth
Shift your focus towards growth and self-improvement. Keep yourself busy in activities that bring you happiness, seek hobbies, set goals, and invest in yourself and your well-being. This can help build self-confidence and decrease the feeling of dependency on a relationship for happiness.
Encourage existing relationships
Instead of looking for a romantic relationship, invest your time in existing friendships and family connections. Developing meaningful relationships with others can deliver a sense of support that you might be looking for in a relationship.
Differentiating between a genuine desire for a loving relationship and feelings of loneliness can be difficult. It is necessary to explore your emotions to attain clarity. While a desire for a relationship may originate from a genuine hope for emotional connection, and love, feelings of loneliness can sometimes hide these desires. Loneliness can make us crave connection and seek assurance through relationships.
The desire for a relationship can arise from different psychological factors. One of the reasons is the basic human need for connection and love. Adding to this, a relationship can serve as a source of emotional security and peace, decreasing feelings of stress and loneliness. Psychological factors such as affection and past experiences can also affect the intensity of the desire for a relationship.
Feeling conflicted about wanting or not wanting a relationship is not uncommon. It is completely normal to experience both the desire for a relationship and the hesitation towards it. This hesitation could arise because of different factors such as past experiences, fear of openness, personal goals, or a desire for independence. Hence, it is important to give yourself the space to investigate these conflicting emotions and understand what truly aligns with your values.
Experiencing a sudden desire to be in a relationship can be impacted by different factors. It could be started by a shift in your personal life, such as noticing the happiness and fulfillment of others in relationships or feeling a sense of loneliness. It is necessary to explore and understand these sudden urges, ensuring that they align with your values and well-being.
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